See more funny videos at CollegeHumor
Chopsticks: A delicate hand and a patient mind will ultimately nourish your soul and
providing insights to my daily life as a anime/manga/game/music/foodie otaku while blogging about my
all-time favourite topic: Beauty Products
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Crank That (Curry Sauce)
Well, you've heard of Crank That (Soulja Boy), right? Now, here's a Crank That (Curry Sauce) version. Yummy!!
Monday, April 28, 2008
Some Useful Condescending Phrases
Some useful phrases to use as an Evil Overlord as given by Steve Meredith. These humorous cuts were originally listed as useful phrases to use around work but they probably only work well if you are a Evil Overlord(TM).
1. Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.
2. The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.
3. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.
4. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.
5. I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't care.
6. I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.
7. What am I? Flypaper for freaks!?
8. I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.
9. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
10. I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.
11. It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off.
12. Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.
13. No, my powers can only be used for good.
14. How about never? Is never good for you?
15.I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to worship me.
16. You sound reasonable...Time to up my medication.
17. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.
18. I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message...
19. I don't work here. I'm a consultant.
19. Who me? I just wander from room to room.
20. My toys! My toys! I can't do this job without my toys!
21. It might look like I'm doing nothing, but at the cellular level I'm really quite busy.
22. At least I have a positive attitude about my destructive habits.
23. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
24. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
25. Someday, we'll look back on this, laugh nervously and change the subject.
1. Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.
2. The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.
3. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.
4. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.
5. I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't care.
6. I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.
7. What am I? Flypaper for freaks!?
8. I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.
9. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
10. I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.
11. It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off.
12. Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.
13. No, my powers can only be used for good.
14. How about never? Is never good for you?
15.I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to worship me.
16. You sound reasonable...Time to up my medication.
17. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.
18. I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message...
19. I don't work here. I'm a consultant.
19. Who me? I just wander from room to room.
20. My toys! My toys! I can't do this job without my toys!
21. It might look like I'm doing nothing, but at the cellular level I'm really quite busy.
22. At least I have a positive attitude about my destructive habits.
23. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
24. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
25. Someday, we'll look back on this, laugh nervously and change the subject.
Friday, April 25, 2008
Thursday, April 24, 2008
Monday, April 21, 2008
Pasta: My Style
Well, to be truthfully honest, I like cooking but I hate the washing up. I'm very sure most people have the same sentiments like I do. Cooking is fun and nothing beats the high and satisfaction when the stuff you are cooking turns up good (doesn't have to be perfect lah..) and when washing up time comes, it sort of becomes a real drag to handle though. Nuff said, here's the simple recipe for this pasta:
1/4 Onions, diced
1/4 Green Capsicum, sliced
Minced beef (substitute for any other meat if you can't take beef)
1 Tomato, sliced
Spaghetti sauce (any brand you preferred)
Method:
1. Cook the spaghetti in a pot of boiling water (add some oil so that the spaghetti doesn't stick to each other) until al dente.
2. Cook/Brown the minced meat together with the sliced capsicum.
3. Add diced onions and sliced tomatoes.
4. Add cooked spaghetti and spaghetti sauce. (You can choose not to add in the cooked spaghetti if you prefer tossing it in your plate last)
5. Serve with parsley flakes and enjoy!!
Simple recipe right, not exactly a chef in the making. But proud to share really simple recipes with anyone who likes spaghetti like I do.
Saturday, April 19, 2008
The Penny Prank
You start by leaving a penny in the shoe of a person you live with. A wife or husband is a good choice.
Next day, leave a penny somewhere else, by the sink maybe. Or a nightstand, in the
middle of the room, just don't be obvious about it.
Every day, leave a SINGLE penny in a different place where your target is likely
to find it. SAY NOTHING ABOUT THIS.
He/she probably won't mention finding pennies until the 4th or 5th day. Keep leaving SINGLE PENNIES, ONE PER DAY, in odd places until your target mentions finding them, and isn't that odd?
DON'T BE INTERESTED. Act like you couldn't care less about this, and change the subject.
On the next day, start leaving 2 pennies, in different places. Be creative. ONLY ONE
LOCATION PER DAY. Now your target will start going crazy, trying to figure out what this means. He/she will probably look to the supernatural, thinking he's trying to be
contacted by the other side, etc.
If you want to be clever, use pennies with dates of special importance to your victim (birthdays, anniversaries, etc.) so much the better!
There is really no end to this prank, just go very very very slowly, and you'll have to come clean about it before your target calls the police or Sylvia Brown or some local witch doctor.
YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE, and you love this person, so you'll know when it's wise to
stop.
Next day, leave a penny somewhere else, by the sink maybe. Or a nightstand, in the
middle of the room, just don't be obvious about it.
Every day, leave a SINGLE penny in a different place where your target is likely
to find it. SAY NOTHING ABOUT THIS.
He/she probably won't mention finding pennies until the 4th or 5th day. Keep leaving SINGLE PENNIES, ONE PER DAY, in odd places until your target mentions finding them, and isn't that odd?
DON'T BE INTERESTED. Act like you couldn't care less about this, and change the subject.
On the next day, start leaving 2 pennies, in different places. Be creative. ONLY ONE
LOCATION PER DAY. Now your target will start going crazy, trying to figure out what this means. He/she will probably look to the supernatural, thinking he's trying to be
contacted by the other side, etc.
If you want to be clever, use pennies with dates of special importance to your victim (birthdays, anniversaries, etc.) so much the better!
There is really no end to this prank, just go very very very slowly, and you'll have to come clean about it before your target calls the police or Sylvia Brown or some local witch doctor.
YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE, and you love this person, so you'll know when it's wise to
stop.
Thursday, April 17, 2008
Prize for Blogger Of The Month (March)
For those of you, my regular readers, I actually signed up for a blog account on MTV Asia Blog, on the very last day of March and guess what? I received news from MTV Asis that I was chosen as MTV Blogger Of The Month - March.. But then, you see, I noticed this blog by a Singaporean that is actually updated every day for the month of March and blogs like this didn't win anything whereas I only signed up for an account on the last day of March and somehow "made up" for the "lack of posts" by blogging in April and I won myself a prize. I hope no one feels jealous though, but still, you can check it out at PuNiaoPuNiao @ MTV Asia Blog
Well, I finally found the time to make it down to MTV Asia's office to collect my prize. (I had initially planned on making a trip to Carrefour at Plaza Singapura for some sushi after that, but well...)I mean, I know where The Atrium @ Orchard is, but not exactly where to go in from to get to the office itself. And coincidentally enough, the security guard who was manning the tower decided to ask for my IC in order to exchange for a pass (feels like taking the MRT in a building instead though..) and I convinced him to take my old school bus pass instead as I needed my IC for prize verification purposes. Well, enough talk from me, here are the pictures I took of the prize after I got home. (It's a shame I didn't snap a couple of photos at MTV's office though, I guess I was too awed to remember taking out my camera phone. But the lady at the reception was very pleasant and sweet too!!)
An envelope marked as Blogger Of The Month - March
An MTV Mousepad
An MTV spiral bound notebook (A4)
A white T-shirt (size L) with a very witty caption (my mother claimed to have seen the design somewhere ago...)
Finally, a photo of all the items together. Seriously, I really like the design on the mousepad and notebook though. I somehow wished they could use the same design on the T-shirt too, it's more attention-grabbing and eye-catching that is sure to turn heads wherever you go.
Well, I finally found the time to make it down to MTV Asia's office to collect my prize. (I had initially planned on making a trip to Carrefour at Plaza Singapura for some sushi after that, but well...)I mean, I know where The Atrium @ Orchard is, but not exactly where to go in from to get to the office itself. And coincidentally enough, the security guard who was manning the tower decided to ask for my IC in order to exchange for a pass (feels like taking the MRT in a building instead though..) and I convinced him to take my old school bus pass instead as I needed my IC for prize verification purposes. Well, enough talk from me, here are the pictures I took of the prize after I got home. (It's a shame I didn't snap a couple of photos at MTV's office though, I guess I was too awed to remember taking out my camera phone. But the lady at the reception was very pleasant and sweet too!!)
An envelope marked as Blogger Of The Month - March
An MTV Mousepad
An MTV spiral bound notebook (A4)
A white T-shirt (size L) with a very witty caption (my mother claimed to have seen the design somewhere ago...)
Finally, a photo of all the items together. Seriously, I really like the design on the mousepad and notebook though. I somehow wished they could use the same design on the T-shirt too, it's more attention-grabbing and eye-catching that is sure to turn heads wherever you go.
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Monday, April 14, 2008
Past Life Analysis
Do you believe in past lives? Have you ever thought of finding out? Now, here's your chance to do so. Just go to this site at www.thebigview.com/pastlife/, enter in your date of birth and press the Press for diagnosis button. It's that simple. Mine went something like:
Your past life diagnosis:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I don't know how you feel about it, but you were male in your last earthly incarnation.You were born somewhere in the territory of modern Wales around the year 950. Your profession was that of a entertainer, musician, poet or temple-dancer.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Your brief psychological profile in your past life:
You always liked to travel and to investigate. You could have been a detective or a spy.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The lesson that your last past life brought to your present incarnation:
You should develop self-love and ability to implant hope into hearts of people. Ambition is not everything. True wealth is buried in your soul.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Do you remember now?
Your past life diagnosis:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I don't know how you feel about it, but you were male in your last earthly incarnation.You were born somewhere in the territory of modern Wales around the year 950. Your profession was that of a entertainer, musician, poet or temple-dancer.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Your brief psychological profile in your past life:
You always liked to travel and to investigate. You could have been a detective or a spy.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The lesson that your last past life brought to your present incarnation:
You should develop self-love and ability to implant hope into hearts of people. Ambition is not everything. True wealth is buried in your soul.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Do you remember now?
Saturday, April 12, 2008
Just in case you need more proof that we live in a crazy world . . .
In Lebanon, men are legally allowed to have sex with animals, but the animals must be female. Having sexual relations with a male animal is punishable by death.
(Like THAT makes sense.)
In Bahrain, a male doctor may legally examine a woman's genitals, but is prohibited from looking directly at them during the examination. He may only see their reflection in a mirror.
(Do they look different reversed?)
Muslims are banned from looking at the genitals of a corpse. This also applies to undertakers. The organs of the deceased must be covered with a brick or piece of wood at all times.
(A brick??)
The penalty for masturbation in Indonesia is decapitation.
(...so they'll never know they went blind?)
There are men in Guam whose full-time job is to travel the countryside and deflower young virgins, who pay them for the privilege of having sex for the first time...
Reason: Under Guam law, it is expressly forbidden for virgins to marry.
(Let's just think for a minute; is there any job anywhere
else in the world that even comes close to this?)
In Hong Kong, a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her adulterous husband, but may only do so with her bare hands. The husband's lover, on the other hand, may be killed in any manner desired.
(Now this is justice!)
Topless saleswomen are legal in Liverpool, England - but only in tropical fish stores.
(But of course!)
In Cali, Colombia, a woman may only have sex with her husband, and the first time this happens, her mother must be in the room to witness the act.
(Makes one shudder at the thought.)
In Santa Cruz, Bolivia, it is illegal for a man to have sex with a woman and her daughter at the same time.
(I presume this was a big enough problem that they had
to pass this law?)
In Maryland, it is illegal to sell condoms from vending
machines with one exception: Prophylactics may be
dispensed from a vending machine only "in places where alcoholic beverages are sold for consumption on the premises."
(Is this a great country or what? Not as great as Guam!)
Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.
(Who volunteers for this stuff?)
Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.
(Is that why Flipper was always smiling?)
The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.
(Hummm....I won't touch THAT one!)
The ant can lift 50 times its own weight, can pull 30
times its own weight and always falls over on its right
side when intoxicated.
(From drinking little bottles of...? Wonder how much the the govt.
paid for this relevant bit of research??)
Butterflies taste with their feet.
(Ah, geez)
An ostrich's eye is bigger than it's brain.
(I know some people like that.)
Starfish don't have brains.
(I know some people like that, too)
(Like THAT makes sense.)
In Bahrain, a male doctor may legally examine a woman's genitals, but is prohibited from looking directly at them during the examination. He may only see their reflection in a mirror.
(Do they look different reversed?)
Muslims are banned from looking at the genitals of a corpse. This also applies to undertakers. The organs of the deceased must be covered with a brick or piece of wood at all times.
(A brick??)
The penalty for masturbation in Indonesia is decapitation.
(...so they'll never know they went blind?)
There are men in Guam whose full-time job is to travel the countryside and deflower young virgins, who pay them for the privilege of having sex for the first time...
Reason: Under Guam law, it is expressly forbidden for virgins to marry.
(Let's just think for a minute; is there any job anywhere
else in the world that even comes close to this?)
In Hong Kong, a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her adulterous husband, but may only do so with her bare hands. The husband's lover, on the other hand, may be killed in any manner desired.
(Now this is justice!)
Topless saleswomen are legal in Liverpool, England - but only in tropical fish stores.
(But of course!)
In Cali, Colombia, a woman may only have sex with her husband, and the first time this happens, her mother must be in the room to witness the act.
(Makes one shudder at the thought.)
In Santa Cruz, Bolivia, it is illegal for a man to have sex with a woman and her daughter at the same time.
(I presume this was a big enough problem that they had
to pass this law?)
In Maryland, it is illegal to sell condoms from vending
machines with one exception: Prophylactics may be
dispensed from a vending machine only "in places where alcoholic beverages are sold for consumption on the premises."
(Is this a great country or what? Not as great as Guam!)
Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.
(Who volunteers for this stuff?)
Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.
(Is that why Flipper was always smiling?)
The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.
(Hummm....I won't touch THAT one!)
The ant can lift 50 times its own weight, can pull 30
times its own weight and always falls over on its right
side when intoxicated.
(From drinking little bottles of...? Wonder how much the the govt.
paid for this relevant bit of research??)
Butterflies taste with their feet.
(Ah, geez)
An ostrich's eye is bigger than it's brain.
(I know some people like that.)
Starfish don't have brains.
(I know some people like that, too)
Thursday, April 10, 2008
Tuesday, April 8, 2008
Bad News...
I myself have realised, "My face looks pissed without me feeling pissed" and that itself might have inadvertently offended a lot of people without me realising it too. Well, let me talk about this incident that happened on 6 April.
I was supposed to work the afternoon shift and I ended up reporting to work close to 10 minutes late. I seldom report to work late and I try not to. And in this case, it's already a bad start to the whole day. Anyway, I went to my work station and everything went on fine as per usual with any other day. Then, this idiot (sorry for the choice of words here, but this rude ass is only worth called "An Idiot!!") asked about our store membership card. And as I was already serving another customer, I had to leave this idiot for a while before I could attend to him. When I did finally managed to get back to him, he seemed a little impatient. And he asked about our membership card renewal process. Anyway, this is how the whole conversation went:
Idiot: My card is expiring this month and I understand that if I make a purchase of $50, I can get my card renewed on the spot, right?
Me: Actually Sir, you have to come back one month before the expiry date to renew your card, but...
Idiot: What kind of attitude is that? I'm asking you about renewing my card and you're telling me that I have to come back one month before the expiry date. Are you paying attention to what I am saying? I want to see your manager!
Me: (blank look on my face and I haven't even finish explaining to him at all)...
Colleague: Why? What's wrong? Did something happen?
Me: (while on the phone) ... I don't know??...
Idiot: What do you mean you don't know? Don't be a customer representative if you don't have the intention of doing customer service?
Colleague: Sir, I apologise...
Idiot: What kind of attitude is that? This is the lousiest service I have ever encountered, I want to see your manager right now!
Me: Nobody's picking up the phone, I think I'll go inside and look for a manager....
Along the way, I muttered some profanity that popped to my mind instantly. (Luckily, I was out of that idiot's range for him to hear anything) I mean, I didn't even get to explain and finish what that idiot needs to know and he cut short my explanation. And if that isn't good enough, he claimed that I was rude when he was the rude one. This is really maddening! I did look for a manager, and the manager was the person who was in charge of my department to soothe the hissy prissy idiot. And the good part? I have a lot of witnesses to attest to the fact that I wasn't rude to him.
To cut the long story short, this idiot did renewed his card and left his name, snail mail address, email address, everything down. I don't know whether he's really an idiot or not. But from my point of view, if I complained about a sales staff, whether I am being mean or just wanted to find someone to vent my frustrations on, I wouldn't be so stupid to leave all my contact details behind for anyone to get hold of, right? Well, this idiot just did that.
And my manager actually tried to pacify my traumatised mind that, "Well, at least you can get back at that shameless goon since he left his contact details for us?" Yeah! That sounds great. Ultimately. But then, I don't think I would want to do that. Spamming his email and stuffs like that. But, if he comes back and give me more shit again, maybe....
I was supposed to work the afternoon shift and I ended up reporting to work close to 10 minutes late. I seldom report to work late and I try not to. And in this case, it's already a bad start to the whole day. Anyway, I went to my work station and everything went on fine as per usual with any other day. Then, this idiot (sorry for the choice of words here, but this rude ass is only worth called "An Idiot!!") asked about our store membership card. And as I was already serving another customer, I had to leave this idiot for a while before I could attend to him. When I did finally managed to get back to him, he seemed a little impatient. And he asked about our membership card renewal process. Anyway, this is how the whole conversation went:
Idiot: My card is expiring this month and I understand that if I make a purchase of $50, I can get my card renewed on the spot, right?
Me: Actually Sir, you have to come back one month before the expiry date to renew your card, but...
Idiot: What kind of attitude is that? I'm asking you about renewing my card and you're telling me that I have to come back one month before the expiry date. Are you paying attention to what I am saying? I want to see your manager!
Me: (blank look on my face and I haven't even finish explaining to him at all)...
Colleague: Why? What's wrong? Did something happen?
Me: (while on the phone) ... I don't know??...
Idiot: What do you mean you don't know? Don't be a customer representative if you don't have the intention of doing customer service?
Colleague: Sir, I apologise...
Idiot: What kind of attitude is that? This is the lousiest service I have ever encountered, I want to see your manager right now!
Me: Nobody's picking up the phone, I think I'll go inside and look for a manager....
Along the way, I muttered some profanity that popped to my mind instantly. (Luckily, I was out of that idiot's range for him to hear anything) I mean, I didn't even get to explain and finish what that idiot needs to know and he cut short my explanation. And if that isn't good enough, he claimed that I was rude when he was the rude one. This is really maddening! I did look for a manager, and the manager was the person who was in charge of my department to soothe the hissy prissy idiot. And the good part? I have a lot of witnesses to attest to the fact that I wasn't rude to him.
To cut the long story short, this idiot did renewed his card and left his name, snail mail address, email address, everything down. I don't know whether he's really an idiot or not. But from my point of view, if I complained about a sales staff, whether I am being mean or just wanted to find someone to vent my frustrations on, I wouldn't be so stupid to leave all my contact details behind for anyone to get hold of, right? Well, this idiot just did that.
And my manager actually tried to pacify my traumatised mind that, "Well, at least you can get back at that shameless goon since he left his contact details for us?" Yeah! That sounds great. Ultimately. But then, I don't think I would want to do that. Spamming his email and stuffs like that. But, if he comes back and give me more shit again, maybe....
Sunday, April 6, 2008
What’s The Big Deal About 2012, Anyway?
For those of you who are not familiar with the significance of 2012, here’s a short explanation: The basis of this event lies in the Mayan calendar, in which time, as we understand it, comes to an end and a major shift occurs in human consciousness. Will this be the end of the world? Or, is it the beginning of a new world? Some believe that the shift will reveal the 4th dimension (time) or maybe the 5th dimension (unity with the unseen Spirit World/Heaven). My spirit guide, Dew has told of a time, near the end of time, when inanimate objects will come to life, including stones, and that our animals will speak to us, to prove God’s dominion on earth.
It is our intended goal to help everyone prepare for what could possibly be the greatest event modern man has ever experienced. It’s not intended to make an apocalyptic prediction (we don’t need more of those). It’s just something that has gotten our attention that has potentially significant meaning for all of humanity.
Wow, that means if there might be a slightest chance, your pet dog would say: "Give me your food!", "Let's go for a walk NOW!!". And as for neighbourhood cats, it would most possibly be: "Hey, you think it's easy being a stray cat? Why don't you selfish human beings start by being more generous and giving us some scraps from your table and stop culling and killing us. We are living things and shed blood and tears too!!"
And now for the near possibility, kitchen utensils. Mothers would most possibly be thankful. Imagine kids using utensils (like spoons, forks, etc) and just replacing them back without washing up. The necessary utensils would most probably say things like: "HEY! Wash me clean before you put me back, okay??"
It is our intended goal to help everyone prepare for what could possibly be the greatest event modern man has ever experienced. It’s not intended to make an apocalyptic prediction (we don’t need more of those). It’s just something that has gotten our attention that has potentially significant meaning for all of humanity.
Wow, that means if there might be a slightest chance, your pet dog would say: "Give me your food!", "Let's go for a walk NOW!!". And as for neighbourhood cats, it would most possibly be: "Hey, you think it's easy being a stray cat? Why don't you selfish human beings start by being more generous and giving us some scraps from your table and stop culling and killing us. We are living things and shed blood and tears too!!"
And now for the near possibility, kitchen utensils. Mothers would most possibly be thankful. Imagine kids using utensils (like spoons, forks, etc) and just replacing them back without washing up. The necessary utensils would most probably say things like: "HEY! Wash me clean before you put me back, okay??"
Friday, April 4, 2008
Amazingly Simple Home Remedies...NOT
1. IF YOU'RE CHOKING ON AN ICE CUBE, SIMPLY POUR A CUP OF BOILING WATER DOWN YOUR THROAT. PRESTO! THE BLOCKAGE WILL INSTANTLY REMOVE ITSELF.
2. AVOID CUTTING YOURSELF WHEN SLICING VEGETABLES BY GETTING SOMEONE ELSE TO HOLD THE VEGETABLES WHILE YOU CHOP.
3. AVOID ARGUMENTS ABOUT THE TOILET SEAT - USE THE SINK.
4. FOR HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE SUFFERERS ~ SIMPLY CUT YOURSELF AND BLEED FOR A FEW MINUTES, THUS REDUCING THE PRESSURE ON YOUR VEINS. REMEMBER TO USE A TIMER.
5. A MOUSE TRAP PLACED ON TOP OF YOUR ALARM CLOCK WILL PREVENT YOU FROM ROLLING OVER AND GOING BACK TO SLEEP AFTER YOU HIT THE SNOOZE BUTTON.
6. IF YOU HAVE A BAD COUGH, TAKE A LARGE DOSE OF LAXATIVES. THEN YOU'LL BE AFRAID TO COUGH.
7. YOU ONLY NEED TWO TOOLS IN LIFE - WD-40 AND DUCT TAPE. IF IT DOESN'T MOVE AND SHOULD, USE THE WD-40. IF IT SHOULDN'T MOVE AND DOES, USE THE DUCT TAPE.
8. REMEMBER - EVERYONE SEEMS NORMAL UNTIL YOU GET TO KNOW THEM.
9. IF YOU CAN'T FIX IT WITH A HAMMER, YOU'VE GOT AN ELECTRICAL PROBLEM.
2. AVOID CUTTING YOURSELF WHEN SLICING VEGETABLES BY GETTING SOMEONE ELSE TO HOLD THE VEGETABLES WHILE YOU CHOP.
3. AVOID ARGUMENTS ABOUT THE TOILET SEAT - USE THE SINK.
4. FOR HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE SUFFERERS ~ SIMPLY CUT YOURSELF AND BLEED FOR A FEW MINUTES, THUS REDUCING THE PRESSURE ON YOUR VEINS. REMEMBER TO USE A TIMER.
5. A MOUSE TRAP PLACED ON TOP OF YOUR ALARM CLOCK WILL PREVENT YOU FROM ROLLING OVER AND GOING BACK TO SLEEP AFTER YOU HIT THE SNOOZE BUTTON.
6. IF YOU HAVE A BAD COUGH, TAKE A LARGE DOSE OF LAXATIVES. THEN YOU'LL BE AFRAID TO COUGH.
7. YOU ONLY NEED TWO TOOLS IN LIFE - WD-40 AND DUCT TAPE. IF IT DOESN'T MOVE AND SHOULD, USE THE WD-40. IF IT SHOULDN'T MOVE AND DOES, USE THE DUCT TAPE.
8. REMEMBER - EVERYONE SEEMS NORMAL UNTIL YOU GET TO KNOW THEM.
9. IF YOU CAN'T FIX IT WITH A HAMMER, YOU'VE GOT AN ELECTRICAL PROBLEM.
Wednesday, April 2, 2008
The "Wake Up" Cat
If you are a lover of cats and cartoons, you are definitely going to love this one too! Watch and enjoy!!